I know I am not alone when I say the scandals of this past week have rocked my faith.

Shortly after the release of the report, I sat with tears streaming down my face as I realized those called to lead and care for the Catholic faithful have gravely abused our trust. While we have all experienced moments where leaders have disappointed us, nothing can compare to learning of the systematic concealment of sexual abuse that has spanned both decades and diocese. As I commiserated to God and angrily demanded to know how He could have allowed this to happen, I happened to glance at the crucifix. For the first time since hearing about the scandal, I realized that I was not alone in these emotions of abandonment and anger. Looking at the image of Jesus hanging on the cross, one thought occurred to me; “This is what you felt."

Looking at the image of Jesus hanging on the cross, one thought occurred to me; “This is what you felt."

Jesus handpicked twelve men to participate in His public ministry on earth. These twelve men were given the opportunity to assist the Son of God in fulfilling His mission to redeem the human race. Of those twelve, only one was present at the foot of the cross. Of the other eleven, one turned him over to the authorities, one verbally denied him three times, and the other nine did not even bother to show up.

These twelve men were handpicked to have an intimate personal relationship with the Son of God. They gave the outward appearance of following Jesus. They traveled with Him during His years of public ministry. They even went so far as to verbally express their love and loyalty to Him.

And yet, only one of them stood by Jesus on the Cross.

We can read in the accounts of Christ’s Passion how Jesus was mocked for how his friends were so quick to abandon Him—how the failure of these men must demonstrate the failure of Jesus Christ. But we know the rest of the story.

Hundreds of the men handpicked by Jesus to lead and care for the Church today have grossly failed and abandoned Jesus for sin. These men do not demonstrate any failure of Jesus Christ.

These men do not demonstrate any failure of Jesus Christ.

If you feel betrayed (and rightfully so), this is your moment for Jesus. He understands the difficulty and pain of feeling betrayed and abandoned by those called to be spiritual leaders. It is a hard road to recovery but know that Jesus can personally relate to being abandoned and let down by those who gave the outward appearance of holiness.

If you feel betrayed (and rightfully so), this is your moment for Jesus.

My heart breaks for the survivors, who suffered abuse at the hands of men picked by God to lead and protect the dignity of every person. Please know that there are so many Catholics who stand by and for you during this time. We (finally) see and hear you.

My hearts breaks for the families and friends of the survivors who have and will continue to walk the road to recovery and healing with them.

My hearts also breaks for the church staff and volunteers who unknowingly supported the priests who committed these atrocities.

My heart breaks for all victims of abuse—physical, psychological, and sexual—especially survivors of child abuse.

My hearts breaks for Catholic social workers and who are realizing this horrific abuse within the Church.

My hearts breaks for all Catholics who are struggling in their faith and who are being pushed even further away by these evil men.

Seek help to grieve and heal from this betrayal.

Jesus is with us. ♥ Now let us remain with Him.